hold on...
Okay. When I'm out and about with all three kids, lately, what people ask...
Sorry...just a second....
WHAT?
NO!
I said NO!
What!
No, not with a knife!
Hold on...be right back.
Okay. Again.
A lot of people are wondering what it's...like...what it...oh for cripe's sake...hold on again.
Just give her the scissors!
I said just give them to her!
No! No, don't even try that on me, I heard you threatening to chop her hair off!
I'm going to count to three, and if...
(screaming downstairs)
All right, I'm coming down there! And I'm bringing the broom and the big whip!
Hold on.
Back.
Hi.
What's it like with three kids, one of whom is just learning to crawl and who has mastered the pincer grip.
Well...it's hectic.
Damn. The baby's awake.
Hold on.
bck
typng whil hdlg thre bebe now.
baby cnuipry cabn='opwrl
baby c;lkfrlknh'
9oe587] y-0hujpl;vmh
dl;
okay the baby is on the ground and i can type really quick except no caps
come back baby
baby!
brb
(sound of pitter patter down hallway followed by larger footsteps)
(sound of screaming)
That's it! Everyone in their room for the rest of the week!
No!
What?
WHAT?
Get a towel and clean it up first!
I don't care if it smells like old milk, clean it up!
bck
kjshg p864]u-046 w ;j4 w40y
baby typinggg[oiauewt[ 'pojaeth'po jaw-05uy ]-03u5yj qpo3y5jpo3yj
thingdslk ar busy;o
here
ow
schoooppllll is out foroij [poij summer
kjoiiiiiiiiiiiiii
ttyl
37 comments:
That was genius. I love your posts.
well, at least the rest of the week should be quiet ;)
Very funny
Ahh, this is so true. I am feeling the pain with two children, I cannot imagine what it would be like with three.
My sympathies. ;)
I'm just impressed it took you until 3 to hit this! I manage with only two. LOL
P.S. I sent you an email not too long ago.
P.P.S. My sister is moving away from there. :( But she is moving HERE. :)
I love your blog! I did a little happy dance this morning when I saw there were new posts. :)
Did posting that hurt? It looked like you may have pulled something. Hope you're ok.
dude. I have been checking back and checking back and -- you know what?
this is exactly what I was hoping to find.
totally worth the wait.
you rule, man.
(I wish I had the funds to hire a coterie of care people and send them to you so you could take a few days off.)
(Not because I'm selfish and want more blog posts from you. just because I love you, lady H.)
(no, really. I really, really - okay, shoot. yes. I wouldn't totally mind it if you happened to write a post or two while taking a nice hiatus from parenting for a few days thanks to my special coterie of helpers. you know. the imaginary ones I'm sending you.)
(sigh.)
Let me know if you get them to stay in their rooms for the rest of the week. I could use a bit of that magic.
Don't they ask "why isn't your husband watching the kids?" ;)
Um. That's me with two.
*snort* This is my life too, and I only have TWO. Bless your busy little heart.
She's not dumb enough to trust me to watch them!
No dear, I trust you with the kids.
It's separating and not shrinking my fine washables that I don't trust you with.
No that we finally have that straightened out, I'm going to the movies tonight.
That was too freakin' funny!
I hear you, I am with you in your insanity!
Very very funny! I have 4 and my telephone conversations always sound exactly like this. It's why I resort to email most of the time, no one can hear the screetching at children between lines. SM posted a link to this on her site and I am so glad she did. It's a great post!
Jozet,
I can't tell you how many conversations I've had like this. It's almost as though you've been channeling me...or tapping my phone.
Two bowls me over.
Two small children and I am fried like a bucket of KFC. My heart says I'm 'supposed' to have one more (or maybe that's my ovaries and sex drive) but my brain says hells no woman!
Funny piece, and a gentle reminder to keep using the Trojans.
Too funny. People without kids do not appreciate how constant the onslaught is.
I'm livin' it baby!
Brilliant. If you'd just let me sign my name to this I'd be really grateful...Oh wait, I only have two. That I know of. (Heh heh)
Yep, that's my life with two, ages 6 and 3. I can't imagine throwing a crawling babe into the mix as well!
As a fellow mother of three, I really laughed at this. My youngest is now 3.5 years old. A friend of mine for several years and I just had our first COMPLETE conversations very recently. We meet at a playgroup. We may even get to know eachother better now beyond, "yes, he pees there too."
Hilarious and so true. My kids start fighting as soon as I pick up the phone... they seem to get up to "quiet" no good if I'm on the internet...
Sometimes I wonder what they are cooking and then I think, bother... they're old enough to know not to set themselves on fire.
Oh, how I relate... we have a crawler with a pincer grasp here too. And a five year old who "just forgets" to pick up her tiny shit all day long.
Loved this!
Bravo! Bravo!
That was hilarious. So well done!
ROFL!
Wait, are you living my life? I have some friends with no children and it annoys them to NO END to speak to me on the phone, as our conversations occur in a very similar way.
I would have to add the threat of, "Do I need to get the spanking spoon?" in there....I believe that comes out of my mouth every couple of hours! :)
I came to your blog via Marylue.....I enjoyed it! I will have to come back!
Hey there, just stopping in via OTJ's ROFL post... This had me laughing so hard. As a mother of three, I definitely relate. The other night at the dinner table my hubby and I kept talking even though our 5 year old (Eleanor) kept trying to interrupt. When it was her turn to talk, I said, "okay sweetie, what would you like to say?" She scrunched up her face and said, "You guys made me FORGET IT by not letting me talk when I needed to." We busted up laughing-- for once the tables were turned.
Love. This. Post.
I have conversations that sound like this, too. But when mine are behaving, I get so annoyed at my friends whose kids aren't. What's wrong with me??
I feel that way with one! Brilliant!
That was awesome. This is why I only have one friend I talk to who isn't a mom.
Wow, who knew you'd become such a popular blogger (or Mom). You should have had kids much earlier in life!
Oh my gosh, I'm so glad I found this post. Hilarious, I'm still giggling. Thanks for taking a little time to share your perspective.
Hahahaha--I laughed out loud through this whole post--THANKS!! :)
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