I don't intend to speak for the higher-ups in the NaBloPoMo chain of command, but I think can guess with 100% confidence that NaBloPoMo was not meant to be about cannibalism, even in a tight spot.
What is NaBloPoMo supposed to achieve other than the achievement for its own sake, and a nifty badge?
Holy moly, I'm just too tired to even think about it and formulate an answer. And on that note....
Question From My Sister
If you could pick one genetic trait to get rid of, what would it be?
Also along that line, if you could pick one to have that you didn't get, what would it be?
I don't even have to think hard about this one. Which is good. Because my thinker is all thunk out right now. I was helping Prima with third grade math, and I'll tell you what: there is a reason that they give you third grade math when you are eight years old. That reason being you haven't yet killed off so many brain cells with coffee and television and bouncy rides in the back of pick-up trucks and Grateful Dead concerts.
I'm just not as sharp as I used to be. Or maybe it's because I just couldn't care less about the speed of airplanes and comparative distances over different times spans. I just don't want to miss my connecting flight. I also don't want to have to take my shoes off to check for bombs, but that's an entirely different math problem that's figured by rounding off the number of toes per foot, making allowances for the square root of the number of toes lost to frostbite.
(You like how I brought the callback around for the punchline? That's Funny 102. I'm auditing that class right now.)
So, the answer to the first question: I want to get rid of my genetic bad vision.
I'd like to have 20/20 vision without corrective lenses and without $5,000 surgery.
My mother and father had perfect vision until they needed reading glasses.
Plenty of my cousins have perfect vision.
I do not.
I got my first pair of large, blue plastic-framed glasses in 3rd grade.
Without my glasses, I would not be able to read this screen.
Without my contact lenses, I wouldn't be able to find my glasses.
I don't think I'm legally blind, but I am legally dangerous without my glasses.
Coffee tables and doorways tremble at the mention of my name.
So that's that. I want to get rid of the "bad eyesight" gene.
The answer to the second part of the question is sort of the flip-flop of the first part: I want perfect vision.
I don't want to worry about stockpiling contact lenses in case of Armageddon.
In case of shipwreck and marooning on a previously deserted island, I don't want to be the first person eaten because I happened to stumble into a tree snare or a pit filled with sharpened bamboo stakes.
Most of all, I don't want to pay $100 a pop for eye exams, $200 for contacts, and I don't know how much for glasses. I haven't bought new glasses for three years. All I know is that they cost a bunch. Sure, Vision Center will say $79 frames, but because my lenses are five inches thick and weigh ten pounds per lens, I need lenses made of the special super-lightweight plastic first invented by virgin MIT students for use in some prank which involved a fake bowling ball dropping into a Harvard law student's lap. Those guys are all millionaires now, by the way. Thanks to my glasses.
Anway, those are my answers.
And now, I'm going to go watch a movie with my husband.
This NaBloPoMo thing has been tough on him.
Because with me using all my spare time writing, the one thing he hasn't been getting is any NaBloPoMo. *wink wink, nudge nudge*
Not even by tempting me with Frangelico.