Who the hell do I have to screw to find a pair of khaki pants that fits me?
Seriously....it's not like I'm astoundingly tall, nor do I have a tail, and although my torso is longish - proportionally speaking - and my belly is a bit poochy, I can't be the only woman of average height and weight, without a tail but with a pooch, who needs a frackin' pair of khaki pants to wear to a flippin' Girl Scout bridging event.
Holy frickin' hell.
The Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire Meme
My seestor hit me up for this a while back. I've been saving this meme for a day when I was feeling a bit cranky and mendacious (thank you, PMS) because I knew that I'd do this meme a harm if I tried to complete it on a sunny, unbloated day.
So, the way I understand this:
I tell you six (6) things about myself.
One of those things is a lie.
You guess the lie.
Good. Let's begin.
1. I took a gun to high school.
2. I got thrown off a racehorse.
3. I know most of the lyrics to Redneck Yacht Club and sing along in my car.
4. I once set my shirt on fire while cooking Béchamel sauce.
5. I kissed Mick Jagger.
6. I ran over a television with my 1966 Mustang.
Boy! Even if two of those are lies, I'd say I've lived a very full life, wouldn't you agree?
Okay now, have fun wit dat, yous guys!