I'm going to punt on this one and present a true Web Log of my day, just so yous guys believe me that this writing thing is sometimes tough to fit into my day.
5:00 AM - Wake before alarm. Instantly return to deep dreamless ether-like sleep .
5:15 AM - Alarm rings. Turn it off and go back to sleep, hoping that the eleven-year-old skater in the next room will sleep through her alarm this morning.
5:16 AM - Hear the eleven-year-old skater in the next room waking up and shuffling around.
5:20 AM - Get out of bed, put on closest pair of pants crumpled on floor, put in contacts, shuffle downstairs, try to find shoes, turn on hot water, prepare packed breakfast, remind skater to bring glasses/brush hair/brush teeth/find violin.
5:21 AM - Run out to car in stocking feet and start car to warm up. Nap in car 5 minutes.
5:26 AM - Go back in house, passing skater who is carrying skate bag, clothes bag, book bag, breakfast bag, and violin on way out. Trip over shoes.
5:45 AM - Crossing the Susquehanna River on East I-83. Wave to Three Mile Island.
7:15 AM - Crossing back over Susquehanna River on West I-83. Wave to the Capitol. Drop off eleven-year-old skater at middle school.
7:50 AM - Arrive home. Hang out with nine-year-old kid. Second breakfast, listen to beginner violinist practice before school, again encourage the hair-teeth-pack bookbag ritual.
8:30 AM - Shoo nine-year-old child out to bus. Shoo four-year-old preschooler out of bed.
8:31 AM - Five minutes of snuggling with four-year-old preschooler.
8:36 AM - Third breakfast, dress four year old, dress four year old again, go out to car, come back into house so four year old can use bathroom, go out to car again, come back into house to get preschool "homework", go out to car for final time.
8:59 AM - Drop-off preschooler at preschool.
9:00 - 11:29 AM - Tame three lions, promote world peace, vote, build a yacht, nap, and then get down to work.
11:30 AM - Pick-up preschooler. Answer 436 compound-complex questions on the five minute car ride home. Have out of body experience in which I visit a lonely mountaintop and take three naps. Return back to body as I pull into the driveway.
12:00 PM - Make lunch for preschooler which I end up eating because now he says he's not hungry. As soon as I finish eating peanut butter and jelly sandwich, preschooler says he's now hungry. Make second peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Preschooler takes one bite and says he's full. Have out of body experience in which I am in sitting under a windmill fashioning daisy chains and whistling tuneless melodies.
12:30 - 2:00 PM Wash every piece of clothing in Cumberland County and am about to be handed Nobel Prize for Household Booyah, when Linus Pauling appears holing a pink striped sock he's found beneath a sofa cushion in my own house. The prize, award money, and tiara all dissolve before my eyes, and I suddenly find myself outside another skating rink handing over Zuca skate bags to my daughter and her friend, lacing skates, and then rushing back to the house again at....
4:00 PM - Get nine-year-old daughter and her friend off the bus, feed and water, set metronome to the 368 bpm at which the remainder of the afternoon must pulse, see husband pull into driveway in his minivan as I back out of driveway in my minivan to transport nine year olds to soccer field.
5:00 PM - Soccer field, shuttle girls from car to field, return to parked car to finish putting my make-up on, arrange hair to look like something not a wild animal on my head, look down to make sure I'm actually dressed and not wearing pajama bottoms (it's happened), and drive to work.
5:45 PM - Begin the relative spa experience which is working at a retail bookstore.
6:00 - 10:30 PM - Play barista and create many beautiful pumpkin spice lattes. Drink three coffees. Feel relaxed. Have an out of body experience in which my body is working in the bookstore, but my mind is actually in the same bookstore rubbing my shoulders.
10:49 PM - Go home. Watch last ten minutes of The Office.
11:15 PM - Start writing.
11:58 PM - Done writing. Set alarm for 5:16 AM. ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
|Usually I vote a straight Baked Goods ticket. |
This time, I went for both a beef BBQ and a pineapple upside-down cupcake.