No Blowing Sunshine Up No One's Skirt In This House

Middle Child: I thought I did well. But I didn't get a part in the play. I must stink.

Mother: No. You didn't stink. Trust your intuition on this. Don't second guess.

Middle Child: But I didn't get a part in the play! I stink!

Mother: No. You didn't stink. You were actually very good.

Middle Child: Harumph!

Mother: Listen, I have twenty years of theater experience. I've taken hundreds of classes. I've been in a ton of plays on real stages in genuine theaters with real footlights. I've taken audition classes and I've held auditions. I've cast and directed enough plays to know what good acting talent looks like.

Middle Child: Harumph! Harumph!

Mother: Believe me, darling, getting cast or not cast in a play can as often have to do with the fact that you are four feet tall instead of five feet. That you're a girl and not a boy. That the director cast his son as the prince, and you look more like the directors son's sister than someone who could play a love interest.

Middle Child: Ew.

Mother:Well, it's true.

Middle Child: I still stink.

Mother: Knock it off. You did well and you are talented. I know it's disappointing, but you need to try, try again. You're good at acting.

Middle Child: You're just saying that.

Mother: (to eldest child) Prima, when I watch you skate and you ask me how a jump or spin looks, do I EVER tell you that you did something well if really it stunk?

Eldest Child: PFFFFT! NO! As if.

Middle Child: Really?

Eldest Child: Really. Believe me, if Mom says you were good, then you really were good.

Middle Child: Oh.

Eldest Child: And if she says you stink, you stink.

Mother: I never say "you stink"!

Eldest Child: Sometimes she says "stink".

Middle Child: So I didn't stink?

Mother: No. You were very good. Believe me.

Middle Child: (brightening) Okay. I believe you.

Mother: Good. Next time, believe yourself.

Middle Child: Okay.


Eldest Child: How was my double salchow today?

Mother: It...smelled.

Eldest Child: Harumph!

Mama Says There Ain't No Flies On Us

4 comments:

Neil said...

I like a Mom who tells it like it is.

Josette at Halushki said...

I do actually give any negative feedback much more gently than "you stink". I mean, unless my kids are way over-the-top with being lazy and trying to get away with 1/10 the effort - that goes for landing jumps or doing dishes or just being swell in general.

Kelly said...

Tell Isabel that I agree whole-heartedly that it probably some idea that the director had in his/her head that she was competing against, and anyway, the triumph is in being brave enough to audition and give it all you've got - no one can take that away!

Josette at Halushki said...

"The triumph is in being brave enough to audition and give it all you've got - no one can take that away!"

Absolutely! I'll pass that along to her! :-)

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