5 year old: A girl kissed me in school.
Mother: Oh really? A girl in your class?
Mother: Did she kiss you on the cheek?
Mother: What did you think of that?
5yo: I didn't like it.
Mother: Did you tell her that you didn't like it?
5yo: Yes. G. and I told her that boys and girls only should kiss if it's your family.
Mother: And what did she think about that?
5yo: Well, she said that sometimes boys and girls kiss if they are in love.
Father: That's very European.
5yo: I'm going to tell her there should be no more kissing.
Mother: So what about you? Are girls kissing boys in your class?
Child: Well. Not in class.
Child: One girl and boy kissed. But it was at a party.
Child: Yeah. They locked themselves in a bathroom. And they kissed.
Child: Yeah. But now they are mad at each other.
Father: Why? Did she tell him he can't play baseball every weekend? Or hang out with his friends?
Mother: No kissing until after grad school.
Child: Wait, what? What's grad school? How long is that going to be?